Life as I see it...

Sail

2011-02-20T18:19:00.000-06:00

Water sea liquid fluid melt ice waves storm horizon wind breeze gushes walls lake pond river stream trickle drown delta canal rafts swim dock navigate nautical knots meander along the river lazy as i watch the sun in the horizon on its way setting ready for the night and the stars to shine upon me while i sail through the seas of life. :)

Homeward Bound

2011-02-09T21:11:00.000-06:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s0_htHcmcbE

I'm sittin' in the railway station
Got a ticket for my destination
On a tour of one night stands
My suitcase and guitar in hand
And every stop is neatly planned
For a poet and a one man band

Homeward bound
I wish I was
Homeward bound
Home, where my thought's escaping
Home, where my music's playing
Home, where my love lies waiting
Silently for me

Everyday's an endless stream
Of cigarettes and magazines
And each town looks the same to me
The movies and the factories
And every stranger's face I see
Reminds me that I long to be

Homeward bound
I wish I was
Homeward bound
Home, where my thought's escaping
Home, where my music's playing
Home, where my love lies waiting
Silently for me

Tonight I'll sing my songs again
I'll play the game and pretend
But all my words come back to me
In shades of mediocrity
Like emptiness in harmony
I need someone to comfort me

Homeward bound
I wish I was
Homeward bound
Home, where my thought's escaping
Home, where my music's playing
Home, where my love lies waiting
Silently for me
Silently for me
Silently for me

Watch This Space

2011-01-26T23:56:00.002-06:00

Haiku:

A new beginning

Stash the days gone by. Refresh.

Look forward today

Lady and the Tramp

2010-01-30T18:51:00.004-06:00

Dish: Spaghetti with meatballs in Vodka sauce

Pretty Good! Reminded me of the Lady and the Tramp scene.... I miss Disney Cartoons...

This is Me

2009-08-16T21:35:00.002-05:00

Below are a common list of symptoms that post grads have mentioned they feel after college:

Difficulty concentrating or making decisions
Feelings of worthlessness or guilt
Focusing on failure
Excessive anxiety
Lack of confidence
Feeling of being overwhelmed
Sadness
Loss of interest in normal activities
Tiredness
Feeling like they're not good enough
Impaired concentration or memory
Inability to cope
Despondency or despair
Hopelessness

Push

2009-04-06T23:14:00.008-05:00

Why do I need that extra push?
Am I still not grown up?
There is something in me that is restricting me from going forward.
My mind says I have to start but something else is holding me back
I know that the consequences will be dire, yet i still sit here and procrastinate.
Why? Why? Why? Why have I lost hope. For some reason I have no will to get me through. I have the motivation but not the drive. I have the incentive but not the desire. I want to start but at the same time want it easy. I don't know if I can face adversity. I don't think I have ever had to work my ass off towards something. I think I am a failure and I feel that even if i try hard I will fall short of my expectations. So what is the point of doing anything. Why can't I be that go getter that I see around me. I have seen so many of my peers accomplish things. Everyone around me is an achiever. All I am is just a dreamer. I dream and dream but never do. I have no idea what some see in me. I give my self self gratitude by believing in them - when i know that I am worthless. Where is that push, that drive that confidence that I had in the past. I am not the same as I once was. I may be smarter but I know i am not wiser. I want that drive and that self belief again. I wish I was a child again. The whole world was my oyster. If i only knew what was up ahead I would have done so much more. I don't even know if I am on the right path. So many decisions I had to make, Now I look back and think - maybe i made the wrong choices....

Cards Anyone??

2008-11-01T11:36:00.003-05:00

Not manipulated at all. Just some cards flopped on the table and voila we see the Ace of Spades!

Dessert

2008-11-01T11:28:00.002-05:00

Check out this sweet white chocolate moose with a pomegranate reduction sauce.

London Broil (grilled Instead)

2008-10-14T01:51:00.002-05:00

The perfect Entree for a hard day. This is one of the dishes Litor prepared as part of his five course meal extravaganza. A flank sliced to perfection is placed on a bed of lettuce drizzled with light vinaigrette dressing with sweet potato hash on the side.

Curry-ssimo

2008-10-14T01:49:00.001-05:00

Dive into this Delicious Chicken Curry to Survive the Blues and Warm your senses. Delicately cooked Potatoes complement this dish perfectly and is served with a Spongy Sour-Dough Bread. Absolutely Belissimo!

Chicken Curry with Potatoes and Herbs A La The Rocketman.

Pepptalk

2008-10-14T01:47:00.000-05:00

Boberino Created a delicacy here, second to none. Parmesan sprinkled Pepperoni and Olvies galore layered on a bed of mozzarella all in a wonderful deep dish pizza dough. After removal from the oven, let it stand and enjoy the aromas. Let the juices flow through this masterpiece and get your knives ready to slice through. It is a mouthful I would take any day!

Deep Dish Pepperoni Pizza A La Boberino!

Cricket

2008-04-21T03:31:00.002-05:00

Some Dreams Fade over time.....but not this one.

The dream of actually playing for my country might be fading ever so slowly but I love cricket and I hope to eventually be solely involved with it. Cricket is like my oxygen. I do not know why I love it this much. People might actually think I am crazy or obsessed with everything about the magnificent game. You know what, I'm really flattered when people think that.

Food Journal/Log

2008-04-16T22:12:00.003-05:00

I have decided to start a food journal starting tomorrow. I will try to be consistant. lets see how long it lasts. I will try to upload photographs too.

These past few days I have been having a lot of .

For Every Darkness, Light

For Every Sadness, Cheer

For Every Wrong, Right

For every Thirst, Beer!

One Month

2008-04-14T06:12:00.005-05:00

Just watched the sunrise...
Will you watch it with me?

Its been a month since my 21st Birthday and nothing has changed or improved. Last month on the 14th I said I would document my progress in this journey but again this was only short lived and it looks 'bleak' again . Has it helped? Maybe it has...I don't really know. I always seem to start something and then revert back to the same rut. Maybe I have been hit by the Monday Morning blues, maybe its just been the weather this past month - the storms really haven't helped.

I need something to kick start my life, because whatever I have been doing or not doing hasn't helped. When I say kick start however I mean it in a positive sense. I do not want something shocking to come my way to make me motivated. I don't think I can handle any more disappointments.

Disclaimer: I write for myself and not for anyone else. I you happen to stumble across my rants take whatever you read with a pinch of salt. I also apologize for being too boring or depressed. This is just a phase and there is no need for concern.

Enjoy the pictures

The Bleakness

2008-04-14T04:25:00.004-05:00

This is Really the hardest part.
The Transition phase starts of fresh as a clear lake
and slowly meanders into a bleak, murky swamp.
I'm scared about my journey and I am second guessing my decisions.
I am surrounded by uneasiness and frustration, overwhelmed with rejection and failure.
Is this reality - I want to deny it. Why is it so rosy for others and miserable for the rest?
Am I making it this way or is this just the path I am destined to travel?
Will it make me stronger or will it make me crumble?
I try my best but I don't succeed.
Should I blame myself or blame it on others?
I rationalize with excuses and never seem to get over the hump.
But I cannot try harder, can I?
I cry inside wanting to go back, wanting to make those decisions again,
but maybe the grass is just greener and I would face the same reality in different forms.
Perhaps, this is how it was supposed to be,
and once I get past this hardest part things will brighten up'
I need guidance through this darkness, where is the confidence I had before.
Perhaps this journey has taken a toll on me but I must not give up because I cannot allow it.
What is worse is that I do not even know how long this will last.
It looks bleak and hard, but then maybe there is light at the end of this tunnel.
I hope and I hope its not against hope.
I must use my time productively and not waste it.
Time. It is the most important thing in the world, for once its gone, its gone.
As I travel, the bleakness grows
I do not know for how long my weakness shows
Give me strength, Please give me strength...

Couplet - I am the best there is

2008-04-07T00:17:00.007-05:00

I Scream, I Yell, I Cry
I'm a drop out, no matter how hard I try

I'm still nobody yet so far, it's a never ending fall,
I romance with cigarettes and alcohol

It gets me away, far, far away,
yet my troubles still they stay

Trivial as they seem, they make me worry all the time,
I'm imprisoned for no reason and no crime

I look above to seek for inspiration,
all I see is darkness and frustration

But then the sun shines and instigates my soul,
this is short lived and soon I face these feelings I can't control

It's hard to explain, I am suffering in vain,
this is a vicious cycle but I have to stop this train

I can believe, I must believe, I will
no matter what, I will conquer that hill

I will move on and make right from wrong,
because I can and I know I am strong

However, this time I am going to shine,
because I know success will be mine

I am the greatest, I am the best there is,
nothing can stop me as I am the best there is.

And Still We Sleep

2008-03-31T16:05:00.002-05:00

We are dreaming of tomorrow and tomorrow isn't coming,
We are dreaming of a glory that we don't really want.
We are dreaming of a new day when the new day's here already.
We are running from the battle when it's one that must be fought."

And still we sleep.

We are listening for the calling but never really heeding,
Hoping for the future when the future's only plans.
Dreaming of the wisdom that we are dodging daily,
Praying for a savior when salvation's in our hands."

And still we sleep.

And still we dream.
And still we pray.
And still we fear.
And still we sleep.

Courtesy: Script from the movie, Dead Poet's Society

The Beatles

2008-03-27T14:33:00.001-05:00

This Spring break I went to Montreal to visit a friend of mine studying at McGill University. It was a pretty fun day and a half. The townhouse apartment he lived in was pretty cool. Check this wall out!

Red Hot Chili Peppers

2007-03-07T20:22:00.000-06:00

RHCP CONCERT - PICTURES SPEAK FOR THEMSELVES

Little Miss Sunshine

2007-02-02T02:14:00.002-06:00

"Dwayne: I wish I could just sleep until I was eighteen and skip all this crap- high school and everything- just skip it.

Frank: You know Marcel Proust?

Dwayne: He's the guy you teach.

Frank: Yeah. French writer. Total loser. Never had a real job. Unrequited love affairs. Gay. Spent 20 years writing a book almost no one reads. But he's also probably the greatest writer since Shakespeare. Anyway, he uh- he gets down to the end of his life... and he looks back and decides that all those years he suffered- Those were the best years of his life, 'cause they made him who he was. All those years he was happy? You know, total waste. Didn't learn a thing. So, if you sleep until you're 18... Ah, think of the suffering you're gonna miss. I mean high school? High school- Those are your prime suffering years. You don't get better suffering than that. "

(Little Miss Sunshine)

Moon

2006-09-28T15:41:00.000-05:00

Watch the moon once in a while
she is like a pearl in the dark sky
she glitters and glows with its white innocence
Pure and simple radiant in the night sky

Watch the moon once in a while
like an angelic being looking down upon earth
she apperars in many shapes but no matter what her apperance
She is always watching you and your every move

Like a conscience wathcing you sin
She still, glows silent just observing
how she makes its surroundings so serene
So peaceful and pure, such an overwhelming presence

She has a mystical sense of eerieness about herself
she knows you are looking at her
She still looks right back at you
As if you are her only target

Watch the moon once in a while
She will rile your mind
and touch your soul
and still she stays far far a mile

Endless Highway

2006-09-27T01:28:00.002-05:00

Imagine driving down a road or a highway with no junctions or exits; no U-turns or forks in your path. Wouldn't it just be amazing? Last summer my friend and I were just chillin in the evening sun, and we came across this idea of an endless road. At first i thought he was crazy, but the more i think of it,the more it blows my mind away.

Let me touch upon the serious aspect of things first. It could mean so many things. It can be a vicious cycle that our world seems to be stuck in. We keep driving along and have no time to stop and appreciate life's twists and turns. We have become ignorant and keep going faster and faster on a narrow path. I like looking at the positives though - It is a metaphore to endless possibilities and opportunities that we as a human race are capable of achieving!

However, I am much more amazed at the simple idea of this never ending road. I feel a sense of secure helplessness. By this I mean, I cannot do anything going along this highway with no exits, but at the same time feel safe and know that nothing wrong/bad can happen to me on this infinite path.

I took this picture, during my best part of day... dusk. I love the warmth, when the settings sun's rays hit your back. It gives me a sense of peacefullness and security. This time of day only lasts for about an hour , but honestly, it is one of the most amazing times of day. One day just take time to sit out in your balcony or look out your window while the sun is setting and just look on into the horizon. The golden rouge colur of the Sky and the Sun is so pleasant to look at - it doesn't hurt your eyes.

You really have to appreciate nature at these times - How something so simple can be so amazing ?